Crumbled Emotions
by Anieshwa
Summary: Just a short angsty one-shot between our favourite couple! America/Fem England. After a particularly trying shot at a relationship, the two take a break only to realise they need each other more than they thought.
1. Somebody That I Used To Know

Disclaimer: I own nothing except for my ideas(: I also dislike the fem version of England, so I am making my own. If you don't like, then don't read!

_Now and then I think of all the times you screwed me over  
But had me believing it was always something that I'd done  
But I don't wanna live that way  
Reading into every word you say  
You said that you could let it go  
And I wouldn't catch you hung up on somebody that you used to know  
But you didn't have to cut me off  
Make out like it never happened and that we were nothing  
And I don't even need your love  
But you treat me like a stranger and that feels so rough  
No you didn't have to stoop so low_

England's POV:

Alfred. The thought of him sent a fresh wave of tears to my eyes. We had been together; actually, honestly, together. I didn't even think that was possible. That he could love me, Abigail, was unfathomable. But it was no fairytale.

Ever since we got together, Alfred hurt me time and time again. We had fight after fight, apology after apology; it was miserable. But, at the same time, it was perfect. I loved him more than anything in the world, more than any other country. Every fight seemed to be my fault though. And that couldn't be true; I couldn't be the one causing them all.

I was done. I was through with him making me feel like the enemy. I refused to live this way any longer, refused to believe it was always something that _I_ had done. I read something in _everything _he said to me, whether he was being mean or not. The last fight we had, it was the worst. He told me he could get over me, and he had proven that. He was…. Over me. He was not hung up on me in the slightest. I was just… A stranger he used to know.

That hurt the most. That he could turn this into something that never happened and just move on like I was never important. Like he never loved me, like he never knew me and all I am is a stranger. It hurts that he could stoop so low and not be bothered in the least. I sigh as I roll onto my side, tears falling. This wasn't how we were supposed to end.

Alfred's POV:

I was a jerk. I knew that. I thought about all the times when Abbie and I were happy, when we were together. That was over, and it was my fault, though she thought it was hers. I had ruined everything. She thought I was the one, that we would be together forever and I broke her heart.

I made her miserable because I couldn't be happy with her company. I was lonely, even with her, but it _was_ love. What we had truly was love. I was just to blind and stupid to see it. I resigned, gave up.

_Now and then I think of when we were together  
Like when you said you felt so happy you could die  
Told myself that you were right for me  
But felt so lonely in your company  
But that was love and it's an ache I still remember  
You can get addicted to a certain kind of sadness  
Like resignation to the end, always the end_

_No you didn't have to stoop so low  
Have your friends collect your records and then change your number  
I guess that I don't need that though_

Both POV's

Did it all have to end like this? Would the pain ever ebb?

_But you didn't have to cut me off  
Make out like it never happened and that we were nothing  
And I don't even need your love  
But you treat me like a stranger and that feels so rough  
Now you're just somebody that I used to know  
Now you're just somebody that I used to know_


	2. Distance (The End)

**Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia, the characters, the lyrics, blah blah blah. You get the picture. All I own is my idea.**

**Alfred's POV:**

I sighed as I listened to the idle chitchat before the world meeting. Of course the one person _I_ wanted to talk to was nowhere to be found. I really should have expected this, I mean the past four world meetings she had shown up at the last minute, determined not to have to make idle conversation with people who never understood her. Not like I could at least.

When she finally did show up, it was as if the Earth and Mother Nature both were determined to show me what a mess I had made of things. She swept into the room, wind blowing her through the door with her hair rushing forward, sun lighting behind her like a beautiful golden aura. She huffed quietly trying to reign in her golden curls, sighing as she saw they had no plan to surrender and look anything less than eye-catching.

She glanced around quickly, sweeping over me as best she could before she found an empty seat next to Japan. He smiled warmly and waved her over, and it was hard not to feel hurt at the relief that washed over her pale face. So this was how it was to start. I watched as she conversed easily with the Japanese man, they had always gotten along well. Although, truth be told, she had always gotten along well with most everyone. Once the world meeting commenced, she laid her face delicately into her hand as she stared into space, the sun filling the space behind her again, causing her to glow.

I sighed as I listened to Russia give us an update as to what was wrong with the world. I didn't need his incessant updates. I knew very well what was wrong in my world. Severe rainstorms plagued even the driest of states, hurricanes ravaged the coasts, and it was all my fault. I was the reason we both felt the way we did, or well….. The way I did. I couldn't be sure she felt the same way. For all I knew she could be perfectly glad to be rid of me. I certainly hoped not, though. I wanted us to give up the pretenses; I just wanted us to at least be friends again. Even that would be enough for me, if she would but look at me with those ocean blue eyes. But it was all over for now.

_The sun is filling up the room  
And I can hear you dreaming  
Do you feel the way I do right now?  
I wish we would just give up  
Cause the best part is falling  
Call it anything but love_

**Abbie's POV: **

I sighed in relief when Germany announced the end of the meeting. I couldn't wait to escape this room. I had to get away from him before I broke down. Again. It was becoming more and more frequent and my country suffered because of it. They had had rain before, but never quite like this. I knew I shouldn't really be this depressed, it wasn't logical by any means. I stood and easily slid past people and into an opening elevator with a few other countries in it. When the doors closed halfway, one more body slipped into the opening and I had to bite my lip to keep from panicking.

Alfred. His name seemed to echo around my head nonstop these days. In fact, I wasn't really sure what had even been discussed at the world meeting today. I couldn't be this close to him. I avoided him at all possible moments, and these thirty seconds down the elevator might very well be the end of me. I couldn't even breathe with him this close and I really couldn't have him see me this way. I wasn't weak, I just…. Couldn't let him go. Even with my heart in a thousand pieces, every beat of it belonged to him. I only wished he could see how much I still longed for him, belonged _to _him.

_And please don't stand so close to me  
I'm having trouble breathing  
I'm afraid of what you'll see right now  
I give you everything I am  
All my broken heart beats  
Until I know you understand_

**Alfred's POV:**

I wanted to say something so bad to her. I was standing with my arm almost touching hers. The burn to save _us _was unbearable. I just….. I couldn't do it with all these other countries around. It would mortify her if I made my case publicly, if I made _us _public. I took a deep breath before turning to face her. The panic in her eyes was clear to see, she resembled a deer that was cornered in the woods with a hunter, but I steeled myself and continued. "Abbie…. Could I speak to you for a moment? We could go for a walk or something?" I questioned gently and as quietly as possible.

I tried to ignore the looks from the other nations we were getting. She was all that was important. Everyone else could shove off for all I cared. She looked around nervously, but finally Japan nudged her and whispered something in her ear. She nodded almost imperceptibly before turning to look into my eyes. "Yes…" she whispered.

_You keep waiting  
To save what we have_

_And I keep waiting  
For you to take me_

*TWENTY MINUTES LATER*

Abbie and I were sitting on a bench in Central Park, the wind blowing her hair behind her. I took a deep breath before standing and offering her my hand. "Let's walk and talk. That way no one can eavesdrop." I add quickly, nodding towards Germany and Russia standing at the edge of the park.

Surprisingly she let me help her up and followed me without pause. I led her away from the crowds and stopped on the opposite side of the lake. I could still make out Germany and Russia on the other side, but at least we were alone. "Abbie…. I'm sorry. I know that I really screwed up and that you probably won't ever forgive me, but knowing that you hate me would be better than this limbo that we've been living in for weeks. I want us to be…. Us again. I was wrong. I always needed you. I just didn't realize it until I let you walk out my door. Please Abbie, I want to try again." I knew it was a long shot, that I was lucky she would even look me in the eyes after all the pain I had caused her. I didn't deserve her forgiveness and I certainly didn't deserve another second chance.

Finally she looked up at me and just stared, shock clearly displayed in her blue eyes. Apparently this wasn't how she had thought this conversation was going to go. I should have known she would have assumed that I would be a jerk again. The last time we talk still haunted my thoughts.

**Abbie's POV:**

I could not believe that Alfred had really said what I had been dreaming of him saying since the moment we broke up. He wanted me? He needed me? Was this still reality? I realized that I needed to say something, and as soon as I opened my mouth, the emotion became too much and the words poured out.

"Are you playing with me?" I asked feeling unsure and slightly hurt. His look of shock confirmed that he was really asking what I thought he was, that this was no dream but reality. "Abbie, I…" he started but I quickly cut him off.

"Because if you are, I can't deal with that. I can't deal with another heartbreak. Mine's already in pieces Alfred. I love you. I have always loved you. I thought that you loved me. Then I thought that I had imagined all those feelings between us. That perhaps I only saw what I wanted, and not what was actually happening. And if this is another one of those hallucinations then I would really like to just have it end. I cannot live through another let down. If it's over then…. Just let it end, for my sake. Because if you start this back up again and change your mind, I'll lose it and then I'll really go insane and…" I was almost sobbing at this point. His arms came around me and I sobbed into his chest. "You broke me… I didn't realize how much I really needed you Alfred. Please don't throw me away again or I'll" I started but soon his lips were crashing into mine.

I only hesitated a moment before kissing him back passionately. My arms snaked around his neck and he yanked me towards him. When we finally paused it was only because I needed oxygen, but his kisses stayed on my cheeks, nose, forehead, hair; whatever he could reach. "Alfred…." I whispered closing my eyes and resting my head on his chest.

His only response at first was tightening his arms around my waist. He pressed another kiss to my hair before lifting my chin so that I was looking at him. He stared into my eyes before he spoke, "Abbie…. I love you too. I know that we have a lot to work through, but you are the only one I want. But if you want me to leave you alone, I understand. I won't force you into anything you don't want to do."

Tears welled up in my eyes as I looked at the man I had loved since we were in school. He loved me too. He wanted forgiveness. "Oh Alfred, yes." I reached up on my tippy toes and kissed him. He smiled into the kiss and deepened it.

"I love you Abbie." He said as he pulled me against his chest and pressed a kiss to my forehead.

**A/N: So sorry I have taken such a long hiatus. I'm trying really hard to either update or wrap up all the stories have going. Thanks so much for being so great though! xD Please review! **

**That's right. It's right there, below. Just review. Just do it.**


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